Give me the 5 leads from Lower Decks + S.A.M as the cadet
Q as DM is a wash as far as I’m concerned: they’re the same picture.
With that out of the way, this could go a bunch of different ways, but here’s my most OP squad:
- Pike
- Riker
- Data
- Scotty
- EMH
- Worf
… and my most dysfunctional squad:
- Shaw
- Beckett
- B-4
- Tilly
- T’Ana
- Reed
Edit: if anyone is looking for a lightweight RPG framework to get this kind of thing moving fast, may I recommend “lasers and feelings.”. The rules are just one page.
Gimme those B-squad antics any day. Somehow, I can see Mariner having no problem following orders from Shaw.
I can see that. Really, I just wanted to maximize confusion, in-fighting, and a general “I’m not great at my job” energy. Because RPGs get really interesting when things aren’t going well.
I also thought about a “PTSD team”, which would be at least Sisko, O’brien, and Picard. I wasn’t sure who else would fill out that roster though.
Stamets and Nog
Maybe Kira as well? She surely has some complex ptsd from the occupation.
She bounced back pretty quick, but if nothing else, she’d be the voice to help them keep their shit together.
Q is the DM ? Janeway, Picard, Sisko, Kirk, Kira

All DMs in every role-playing game are basically Q, so you get that for free.
So, Q’s chosen few (includes Trelane’s influence) and one he dare not fuck with. Nice.
Many times the Prime Directive will be broken 😈
In that case I’ll run Janeway, Janeway, Janeway, Janeway, and Sisko.
Name the 5 best starship captains of all time.
Janeway
Janeway
Janeway
Janeway and
Janeway
Because she spit hot fire

Sisko won’t question the four Janeways as long as you let him either meet someone famous or LARP as a historical figure.
I figure they’ll balance out, it’s effectively a 9-person away mission because you just know the janeways will just make more janeways if something happens.
9 Janeways? Just enough for a baseball team. The Sisko will be pleased.
Well, 8 Janeways and a Sisko, so he can be shortstop or something.
“Janeway Doopler” is a horrifying circumstance to imagine.
It’s the Janeway effect. She mastered eternalism for an ensign, you think she isn’t going to keep reinforcements available?
Data - because Q has a thing for him.
Guinan - because she has unspecified mystery plot powers.
Quark - to “acquire” goods and services for the party.
Odo - to keep Quark from getting bored and selling our possessions while we sleep.
Miles - so I have someone who won’t be traumatized by being constantly thrown to the wolves, both figuratively and literally.
Quark is a good choice
He definitely seems like he’d be useful, but you can’t leave him to his own devices or before you know it the whole party is going to be thrown in prison for trying to smuggle dreammist or something.
My alternate list is just Bones, Pulaski, and T’Ana - to see which of them can be most crotchety as well as which can come up with the most batshit insane “cure” to whatever medical issues come along.
Not sure why no one is mentioning Garak. Seems like a no brainer
What good would a simple tailor be to the party?
Garak is too busy to go galavanting around with a bunch of adventurers. A fantasy world surely provides an ample supply of garments to be repaired.
I’ll take 5 O’Briens please.
And a side of pattern buffers
It’ll get done, whatever it is.
It’ll fucking hurt… but it’ll get done.
DM: *reveals big plot twist
All O’Briens simultaneously: Jaysus
This brings up a mental game I’ve played of trying to decide which Star Trek characters would be the best tabletop DMs.
Here’s my TNG list:

For the record, I think although TNG-era Worf would not be a great DM because he’d be so focused on combat that you’d get the impression he’d rather be playing 40k instead, by the time he reached his DS9 era, he’d have picked up a lot more openness to narrative and be much better.
Also, I think early season Wesley would actually be better than Starfleet Cadet Wesley, as he’d show a ton of promise and enthusiasm at first, but seems to become fairly insufferable by the time he’s a cadet.
I now want to see a lost episode where Wesley discovers tabletop, attempts to DM a campaign with the crew, and fails spectacularly. Thank you for this.
Guinan was number two on my list, but I didn’t tier them really. I mean how can you not take the mysterious alien whose species has ill-defined powers, lives hundreds of years, and is allegedly near the level of the Q evolutionarily? (although apparently not near enough to avoid assimilation)
I am not playing dnd with Q. Dont get me wrong, id love to meet Q and hang. And his abilities could make for the best dnd experince ever, but Q is such a prick. I cant imagine hed host a good session.
Generally speaking tho,
My physical stat character is Worf.
My caster is Troi.
My trap disarmer and general know it all is LaForge.
My cleric is Dr. Crusher.
My overpowered does it all better than all of them character is Data.
Ill give you one guess as to which series I grew up watching.
But if you don’t play dnd with Q how can he judge humanity?
Thats why id be down to hang with him! Id love to make him misjudge humanity.
Just me and a bunch of red-shirts. And, Scotty better not be drinking again.
“Scotty! It’s Jim, beam me up!”
“Jim Beam? Don’t mind if I do.”
Oath of Glory Paladin - Worf
war Cleric - EMH/ECH
Thief Rogue - Quark
Divination Wizard - Wesley
Armorer Artificer - O’Brien
Sword bard/face - Okona
war Cleric

Excellent choice
Dual-classed into Monk so he can get Way of the Astral Self and put that holo matrix to good use!
Ortegas (rogue), Ransom (
barbarianwarrior), Phlox (cleric), Spock (paladin), Geordi (wizard), Odo (druid), Vic (bard)Ransom sounds more like a warrior to me.
Neelix is the NPC rat in the first encounter
Fixed.
Any 2 Neelix rats that touch combine into two-lix.
That’s it we have a campaign
Barbarian/Guardian: Worf
Cleric: McCoy
Warlock/Oracle: Ezri Dax
Paladin (Oath of Redemption)/Investigator: Liam ShawI think that would he a good mix of characterisation to classes (DND and pathfinder)
- Data: utterly OP, can’t not take Data
- Troi: always helpful when people are involved
- Riker: good leadership while being more physically capable than most captains, bold enough to endanger himself and his crew if necessary but smart enough to avoid it if not
- Bashir: Can handle any medical emergencies and, again, highly physically capable compared to other medical experts
Riker as the bard. Just don’t ask him to play Night Bird as that will debuff the party.
Geordi for his smarts. Worf in case of combat, 3 redshirts. You know why.
Bolian with IBS.
As a mob boss or the party’s deterrent for lesser foes? Also a deterrent to the party.
They can use his bowel movements to breach hulls on enemy ships. 😃

Don’t care if this is a spoiler. Well played.











