As a person who has their BPD under control so well that my psychologist doesn’t feel fully comfortable diagnosing me with it anymore, seeing stuff about how be need to be avoided still hurts, a lot. I’ve put in the work, I’ve never missed an appointment with my current psychologist, I do my best to keep myself stable, and to not hurt others or myself, but I feel like I can never escape this diagnosis. I feel obligated to tell any romantic partners that I have BPD, only for it to be used against me. No matter what I do, I’ll always be branded by this, even if I haven’t exhibited symptoms for years. I feel like I’ll either have to lie to people, or tell them truth and walk on eggshells, afraid that any negative emotion will make them think I’m insane, abusive, or crazy. I just want to live a healthy and happy life.

I was at a classmate’s apartment and her very drunk stepdad came over. My classmate was getting ready to go out and I was just chilling on the couch and the stepdad sat next to me, trying to hold a conversation. He put his legs on my lap, trapping me in the corner of the couch. I don’t remember what he was saying, but at one point he sits up, grabs my head with both hands and licks my face from my chin to my forehead. When I told about it to a trusted adult later that day, they just laughed with me about it. Years later I really wish they wouldn’t have…