In a sense, you both get points. But in another real sense, Barney gets points.

Damn you universe, you made me agree with Ted Cruz!

I wish I had a monkey’s paw.

That’s The Pedophile Oath. You put your right hand in the air, your left hand in your pants and say that.

Kids! We’re good parents again! Now get your asses out here!

Lard of the Dance.

If he’s not in class, he’s risking his ass.

Up yours, Children!

Homer, you’ve got it set to ‘Whore’.

Wizard of Evergreen Terrace

I wanted to say it was the bad talent show at the beginning of They Saved Lisa’s Brain, but Homer was ‘hot buttered’ for that one

Be like the boy!

Do you sleep in a racecar?

I sleep in a bed with my wife.

Ray Patterson

Hurricane Neddy.

Oooh! Kicking & Screaming, please

That reconstruction looks like Harrison Ford fucked Jon Voight.

These points have been holding me back for too long. I’m going to Clown College.

Eye of the tiger, mouth like a teamster!

As long as I have my solid gold house, my rocket car, and my millions of points, I’m happy

Pick a bar? What the hell is ‘pick a bar?’