I dressed up in the pink skirt I ordered, dark blue sweatpant bottoms, and a thick leather jacket that hides most of my features. And a mask over my face to still hide the moustache…
It was midnight on a Sunday so zero people out in my neighborhood. It was calm and quiet and chilly and empty. Made me feel… more okay with it. And then I went home and stared at myself in the mirror for like half an hour.
Haha im so fuckeddddddddd
Is your mirror thing where you also stand there and stare at yourself and feel like, mental switches gradually flipping to where you actually see yourself as feminine/a girl and not just surface pretending/hiding? Cuz that’s kind of how I felt.
Get a skirt girl!! I could recommend the Amazon one I got, it feels pretty nice although maybe a little bit short (it’s about 15")
Kind of, I used to avoid the mirror a lot, but when I looked in it I mainly tried to figure out why I didn’t like it, and then I had a couple of times (e.g. accidentally covering my eyebrows) where my brain did flip some switches for me and I felt pretty good about it. Socially transitioning did more of the switch flipping in my case, I don’t think all the staring in the world would’ve changed my stubborn mind lol.
Nowadays I look in the mirror a lot, but that’s for other reasons (“ok but like how do I look today”, or “what can I change about my face to be more fem”)
Regardless I’m happy yours isn’t so toxic by comparison, seeing a girl in the mirror is honestly pretty tough for me, so I’m glad you’re already doing that.
I will do! I do have a couple polyester skirts but I’m mainly looking for something I’d be happy wearing to University or something, I remember really liking the “houndstooth” one that icky had on her website but they ran out and aren’t restocking in the near future :(
I hope one day to be brave enough to do some level of social transition…
I wish you great luck finding a cute skirt you like <3