Not sure If this are right place for that (and sorry, while I do speak Englisch okay-isch, I am not native speaker), but this thoughts does make impossible to sleep at nights.

My life is taken really bad turn many years ago, and 5 years ago it become just broken.

I had my parents, my sibling, place where we lived. Everything was fine. Or I thought so.

My sibling for almost 2 whole years is… dead. There is nothing ceremonious about it. They are just… Dead.

I thought that I had wonderful parents. Even despite beating, screaming and other stuff that they told and done to me throughout the years. One of them just did not do much as parent. That resulted in many mental and physical issues, that I feel to this day.

I remember my hometown. It is now turned into rubbles. It was not great place, but I liked it.

As result of all of I left with only to move to different country, to start my life here instead.

But it is hard. Learning languages is hard. Trying to navigate this world is hard. And I do not have that much time to fix all of that.

I was always socially akward. It is hard for me. I have issues with both my body and my mind, my health. But I am mostly on my own now. With no idea how to proceed and how to deal with this pressure.

And all of that just makes me not wanting to sleep at night. Like now.

I keep thinking about that.

How go people deal with that?

  • discocactus@lemmy.world
    7·
    8 days ago

    Definitely never had to deal with anything like that. But people do go on. You have a lot of trauma so probably a lot of what you are feeling is because of that, and it’s normal, but if you can find people to work through it with that will help. Probably try to find a group of people with similar backgrounds, or at least a therapist or priest or bartender to talk to. I’d seek out some books about people who have dealt with similar things- there are a lot. Some uplifting, some not. Probably work look for the uplifting ones. If you’re trying to learn the language of your new home probably get in the habit of going to a library anyhow, and I bet a librarian would be able to help you find some books about people surviving war and trauma and death. Man’s Search For Meaning is a pretty rough but good read. I will add that when you are young it feels like you don’t have much time, but the fact is you do. Start building little good habits. Help a neighbor. Take a walk. Read a book. Pick up some trash. Find a group to play chess with. Stuff like that.

    • Valerie Ashborne@feddit.orgOP
      3·
      8 days ago

      Probably try to find a group of people with similar backgrounds, or at least a therapist or priest or bartender to talk to

      I wish but language barrier is really hitting hard :( English would not cut it. Which is very tragic, because that is one of not many things in life that I can deal with and have interest about.

      I will add that when you are young it feels like you don’t have much time, but the fact is you do.

      I wish, but ability to stay in other country is not right — it is an privilege :(

      And unless I will be able to work this out — I would not be able to stay, being forced to get back, to… Nothing :( there not much left to return to.

      Probably work look for the uplifting ones.

      Maybe I should try. But I do not know, if that going to help. I am already find myself ignoring real world too much, because it is not the best place :(

      Man’s Search For Meaning is a pretty rough but good read

      Is it in English?

      And thank you, very much for taking time to reply, I appreciate it.