A handjob is a handjob.

My cat goes where he shouldn’t and stares at me menacingly adorably.

That’s not a house centipede. That’s a Fuck You Centipede.

Maybe you’re a robot.

Ever had? Really? What exactly did he do that is so astounding?

Is a wall of text with a couple doodles at the bottom really a comic?

I did.

I hate it. I try to buy local, I really do. But everybody is like “we don’t have that, but we can order it for you!”

Goddamit, I can order things myself.

Do they make shrill and unpleasant sounds?

This happened in 1896. Wasn’t much else to do besides train crashing and watching executions.

But yeah, Katy do suck lol.

They sure knew how to put on a show back then.

That is a LOT of bananas.

Pussies.

People are downvoting you, but I get it. My dad loved old time radio shows. And his favorite part was the old advertisements.

My cat is ridiculously comfortable, all the time, no matter what the situation is.

I’m so jealous.

That’ll show the fucker.

Smoked paprika is the best!

Do you use fresh or dried chives?

It doesn’t matter. You wouldn’t be able to do it anyway.

You cutting baling wire with that thing??

Not in _G_eneral, no.